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The child entered the room when you're busy making love with their partner is a scene that many couples feared or feared, although maybe the probability is very small. But as a form of anticipation, you must know how to explain to the child about what you're doing with the couple.
"This kind of experience is very natural to happen and this is why every parent needs to teach and familiarize the children knocked on the door before entering and always respect the privacy of others," said an expert sexologist Logan Levkoff.
"But before you say something to the children when they came into the room and caught the middle of fuck you, you have to know what they see and hear or whether they care about what is going on," he added.
Most experts agree if the parents should not worry if they are intimate in their near children or babies.
"Many families who choose to sleep with their babies or children. Needless dangerous if parents engage in sexual activity while the baby was sleeping or are in one room and awake. Moreover, the baby can not process what parents do so it will not give any significance to them, "said Naparstek psychotherapist Jennifer Klein as reported by CNN, Sunday (04/28/2013).
But sexuality consultant and founder of the site GoodInBed, Ian Kerner said however that every parent needs to know about sex explanation they would give the child must also be based on the child's age.
- Toddler
Toddlers usually do not understand what sex was, but there also needs to be notified and given an explanation of the activities that parents do.
"The kids usually just want to know if it's something that parents do is violent, something scary or not and it needs to be explained," says sex therapist Margie Nichols.
"When my son was a toddler, he thought his stepfather middle 'hurt' me because we sounded so noisy and at midnight I can hear our voices," Gomez said.
After that, explain to your children that you and your partner are enjoying private moments and stress if you do not hurt each other. If the child does not have other questions, do nothing.
- Children of primary school age
Elementary school-age children have had considerable curiosity towards sex but at the same time, they still want to keep away from the subject.
"Always look at the child's reaction when talking about this. From there you know how far the discussion of sex he can handle. If they look too comfortable to talk about sex, just save it for later," advises Klein.
- Pre-teens (transition between children to teenagers)
At this age, many children already know what is going on with his parents and often showed disgust (such as a sound of disgust out loud) when accidentally entered his parents' bedroom and saw both were making love.
"But this is the right time to give understanding to your child that sex is something that is private and fun activities that are common in adult relationships," said Nichols.
- Teens
"Children who are older sometimes amused when parents know they were intimate but if they are too long to see it, it will create discomfort and anxiety," said Klein.
"At least the kids are teenagers who have been able to cope with a situation like this better but they will not see it. Just ask any teenager, I guarantee no one would like to see parents making love," he added.
Yet later that should be anticipated not only about sexual activity, but you also have to be able to explain other things that they could find in the house or on the street such as sex toys, masturbation tools to pornographic content.
"The average child has watched porn since he was 10 years old. It is everywhere and too naive when you think your kids will not see it," says sexual health educator Amy Lang of Birds + Bees + Kids.
"Tell them what it was pornography before they see or find it yourself. Say 'sometimes people watch pictures or videos of people having sex.'s Called pornography or pornographic. But this is not for small children, after all, the children are not ready to see things like this. You will not get into trouble if you do that but I want to make sure you're okay. '"Nichols advice.
But if you know the child had been exposed to pornographic content, talk well and without emotion. Try to ask where to get the content of the child and ask her to ask questions about sex that he may have been buried, only then will give the right information, he added.
Equally important, you should take precautions before the incident the child came into the room when you make love do not happen again. Them to lock the door, get children to knock on the door before entering the room, play soft music or TV slowly as a distraction and scheduling 'privacy time for parents' so that children will not disturb you both.
Just do not ever cover up the intimacy between the two of you in front of the child. "Showing affection (but that is not sexual) in front of the children can be a wonderful thing. Children also need to know that their parents love each other and to provide examples of how to express love in a healthy way such as kissing, hugging and holding hands, "Nichols closed.
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source: detikhealth
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